The Kiasu Poison

after just a few days of work, i'm very annoyed by kiasu singaporeans. No, these people aren't found at work. at work they're polite, courteous people who hold doors open for others and smile and greet each other in the morning.

i think there's some toxin in the Singapore air. The Kiasu Poison. TKP. The moment these people step out of their offices and start heading home and inhale TKP, they transform and mutate into ugly abominations.

When the train comes, (or even if it isn't) they begin to move strategically towards the yellow markings that indicate the different entrances. Those with some level of resistance to TKP just stand behind the demarketed line, but inch as close as possible.

Those who are badly infected stand in the MIDDLE of the freaking zone, desperate to be the first one to board the train. Are they stupid or blind? People need to come out right. Oh yea but wait, TKP neutralizes the senses, it just makes you want to be first, to be comfortable, to be selfish.

When the door opens, they RUN in. I've seen some ppl LITERALLY run for the seat, it's almost comical. Then as they sit there snug and comfortable, TKP surges, making them blind too. It doesn't matter if there are elderly people or ladies standing near them. No, they need to be comfortable what! standing on the train is VERY tiring , especially with TKP weakening the body.

I think we are in need of some antidote. Legend has said that a particular curly-haired man with yellow boots holds some antidote in his Repelling Anti Poison formula. I think the government actually released some of this R.A.P at MRTs all day long for a period of time, and i think it actually helped the situation abit.

But as all bio students know, virus (or bacteria?) develop a resistance to such things over time. So i guess now, TKP is immune to the R.A.P and still plagues all commuters.

So i guess i'm stuck with having to stand on trains for my commuting, since I've actually a strong resistance to TKP due to my inoculation of Caustic Orange UV Rays Through Enormous Sharp Yawns when i was a little boy so i don't behave in such an embarassing manner as the infected.

Ok, time to go and start mentally preparing myself for work tomorrow and plan all my activities and make ample calculations so that i can finish my work fast tomorrow.

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what?