update.

sorry for the lack of posts with substance lately. By substance i mean like.. more thoughts? personal stuff? yea. I took a look at the current page of my blog (as in all the posts you can see when you click http://alanz-.blogspot.com) and realised that none were like.. -feeeling- blogs. Yknow, like when you got the -feeling- then you can write a damn long and insightful blog. Or at least interesting (or so i think).
So thanks for still visiting my blog when it's boring! My blogder (blog reader) pool is small but loyal! <3 (or so i think again. lol. ) Quality before quantity!

ANND, guess what, i've got the feeling now!! yea! Actually had it on my way home from church today, but didn't wanna use the computer so soon and wanted to study. but after going through 8 chapters of physics, i decided to blog before i lost the feeeling then go back to finish up the other 3 chapters (11 chapters of J1)

I don't know if it's just me or perhaps it's the period of life i'm going through, i keep getting hit by waves of nostalgia and i find myself reminiscing more than before.

Like just today when mike mentioned the basketball league in 2008 (which i wont get to take part in cos of stupid NS), i was suddenly immersed in thoughts of the previous bball competition (1 of only 2 bball competitions in my life) i went for, at CCAB in bukittimah.
Thoughts about how well i played (well besides the steal off gabs, (gabs is my team) i thought i played rather well. and gabs agreed too.), and how i could have played better. The feeling of walking to the changing room and thinking about the game that just ended. Sweat-soaked, but proud, nonetheless.

And that particular game.. the one where we started with joel,tianen,gabs, where my bad decision may have cost us the game.
[text in blue is basketball related stuff, if you have 0 knowledge of bball you can skip]

Ok i was the team captain in case you didnt know (stupid ben go put me as captain), so i was kinda responsible for deciding the teams. (though i was extremely democratic) So with that particular lineup, it would be natural to play a low-post game, pass to joel/tianen at lowpost and they attack the basket using their height advantage.
However, i think joel was very nervous or something, and he was playing quite badly. Like pass to him , FIRST PASS, he would just shoot. -_- And there was noone inside to take rebound obviously, since he was supposed to get rebounds and it was just off the first pass.
Our team started trailing by a bit, so a substitution was necessary. But because before the game Tianen mentioned something about his ankle giving him problems, so i had his injury in mind, and asked alwyn to sub tianen instead of the correct choice of subbing joel out.
And yea, we lost that game.
(no i'm not blaming joel for that loss. we all made our mistakes. i threw one ball out of bounds (supposed to be a pass to either pewi or tianen but both ran away) . but, i just made a wrong substitution on that one. :( )


Basketball aside, i've been thinking about the past 12 years of education. like wow, it's all over. And my next phase of life after NS will be crucial. Yknow they all say PSLE is impt as it decides which path you take, then O levels is impt as it decides which path you take.
Guess what, now i have to decide which DESTINATION i want to reach.

When i look at little kids running around nowadays, once in a while i'm just struck by how carefree they are. Seriously, having no worries about tomorrow, they just enjoy today. Wouldn't life be great like that?

As i look back at all the friendships, the enmities, the joy, the sorrow, the fun, the heartbreaks, i realised how much each incident has built me up even more. Some people i won't miss, some people i just want to see again. My wrong decisions come back to haunt me, making me wish i could go back in time to change them.

Now as i look ahead.. what is there in the near future? I need to get past this freaking screwed up 4weeks of exam. Seriously! 5 subjects and it takes 4 weeks to finish?!? ridiculous!
just as christabel said just now in an SMS:
"damn weird la i think cambridge use their feet to think of the (exam) timetable"
LOL.
That seriously made me Laugh Out Loud when i first read it.
Yes, so i need to get past this exam period which cambridge used their feet to plan, need to keep studying though i've already studied (i have to study for phys/chem 3 times each, because both of them have 3 papers each,and each paper is on a diff week -_- )

Then after that.. post exam celebrations!! rawr. made some plans already, gonna marathon some shows like heroes/pb, watch movies , play standard game /dota, go out, play badminton.
Oh and i really have to start swimming again. I never got any medal in swimming (most people i know who can swim all got lifesaver (one step up after gold medal), stopped learning halfway. So i need to refresh my swimming ability.. otherwise in army must go for training when other ppl who can swim can rest.
And i gotta exercise!! ugh yes.

Every minute every second will be precious.

And it begins now.

i'll be natural and let myself win you over.